Survivor: Baby Shower-episode 2

Last week, we learned that Baby Showers are not always the happy, present-filled celebrations that you might expect.  Some are actually a version of an Uber-reality show: Survivor:  Baby Shower.  

In this episode, we'll hear stories of labors that lasted 2 weeks, without pain medication, babies who were turned sideways, doctors who don’t show up, unmitigated, relentless pain, water bags breaking in supermarkets……I could go on an on, but you get the idea.
  
Though not stated, it’s understood, that the new mom should not cringe, protest or worse, skip the presents, get up and leave.  “I’m outta here!  You guys are scaring the …*&%$!!…out of me!”
  
In order to survive this party, she has to endure this rather macabre ceremonial re-telling of birth stories.
  
“How on earth,” she thinks, “do women have 2nd or 3rd babies, if the first ones were so awful?”
  
Where is she?  Where is the mom who had the easy birth?  Where is the woman who had a little discomfort, showed up at the hospital at 8 cm, felt that she might have to go to the bathroom,  burped and, whoops, here’s the baby?  Why don’t these women come to baby showers?  And, if they are there, why don’t’ they speak up?
  
Have you attended one of these baby showers? 
  
Have you participated in the ancient tradition of gathering together and re-telling your own birth story? 
 
Have you been the babe in the woods, exposed to these stories? 
  
What is it that compels mothers to re-tell the most extreme and bizarre birth stories to women who are about to “blast off” into uncharted territory? 
 
 
Exile Island
 
I say we vote Scary Birth Stories OFF the island, or at least send them to Exile island.